I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Randomize
