Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're like the curious george of whores
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
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