She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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