There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I think my fart just growled at me.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
