You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
