I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize
