just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize