At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize
