Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Randomize
