she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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