My cat gives me a boner
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
