im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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