I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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