I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize