I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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