it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize