seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
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