Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
This is my gift to your gina
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
