Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
