Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
it's like heaven, but drunker
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
