wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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