Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
