yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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