Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
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It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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