I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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