Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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