She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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