when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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