is your mom at the bar?
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
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