Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
