she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
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I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
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We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"