oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
You were trust falling into bushes
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize