So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
You've changed since you got that strap on
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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