its not stalking. its research.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
