Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Randomize