The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
