you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
