I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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