so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
