Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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