I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
