That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
no you cant smoke seaweed
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
