You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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