i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
