Please don't use social media to get back at me.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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