You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize