You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
