I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
