I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
