i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
