At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
